Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Almost there.

Haha this picture is from Matt and my first date last summer. Its not the best picture but it works :)

Matt and i celebrated our one year anniversary last week. Seriously!? Its hard to believe that a year ago last tuesday we went on our first date and realized that we both really liked each other.. It doesnt seem like its been a year. Its been a good one though for sure. Hard.. but good.

We celebrated by going 2 hours north on Long Beach to Santa Barbara. It has to be one of the most beautiful places ive ever been. The city has a small town feel and is surrounded by mountains and pretty rocky beaches. We have fun traveling together, discovering new places, and sometimes getting lost in the process. I love being with Matt and am so thankful i got to spend another half of my summer with him here.

I had a hard time letting my self understand that this is ok but i know the reason i came out here was because of him. I think ive grown up in differnt ways than usual this summer. Ive grown spiritually.. but more so ive grown relationally. By being with Matt the Lord has shown me things i need to work on and highlighted the good things in me. Im learning life skills. Of couse i wish i knew a book of the bible like backwards and forwards after being here 6 weeks but im really excited about what the Lords maturing me in. It feels so good knowing my character growth is just as important to him as my spiritual knowledge.

Im leaving here a week from today.

Im ready to get back home.
Im ready for consistancy.
Im ready for routine. (I was a fool to think that i could give my self routine out here.. and 15 pounds later im feeling the defeat in that. ha)

Im half way ready to face challenges.

Im not ready to leave Matt and..
Im not ready to fight the battle that a 9 hour long distance relationship brings..

I learned receanly that 70% of all communication is non verbal.. hints why being in a long distance relationship has its struggles...

Im learning to trust though.

Im learning that Love "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (1cor3:7)

Its been a good summer so far. I still have half of one left and im not gonna lie.. im kinda excited about getting to spend the rest of it in the heat of Alabama at my house on Caplewood.

We're too young to realize that the things we want to do are impossibe
So, We will do them anyways.

Saturday, June 6, 2009


I'm sitting on my couch in the Beach Plaza Hotel.
Long Beach is one of the most interesting places..
We have drug dealers living under us..
Homeless living right out side our doors..
Million Dollar houses down the street..
And a homosexual coffee shop across the park from our hotel...

With all of these differences the world seems to still go on..
No one is disturbed... of course there is chaos.. but at the same time its just how things are...
Its sad really..
sad that the norm is chaos..

I feel peaceful though..
In the midst of fear.. fear of earthquakes.. failure as a disciple.. and of all the violence that could happen any time..

I'm listening to an instrumental song that Jessica gave me in tenth grade when she got home from church camp..
The song has helped me sleep many nights and just brings back flash backs of good times.. with her.. with the lord.. i keep playing a scene in my head of riding in Jessica's car with her and Meghan Hill singing our lungs out to U2 on the pb and j mix.. i miss that. I loved the summer after my tenth grade year..
Being here has made me really realize how much I've grown up.. grown up from that place..
Meghan in getting married.. along with 2 of my other friends who i spent that summer with.. its so weird...

Monday, June 1, 2009


Ill write a long update on the summer sometime soon but a few things I've learned in long beach so far..

That the Lord taught me way more than i thought in my so called dry season of my life.. The past year Ive felt like not much has gone on in my life spiritually but had the realization today that God was speaking in the silence.. I figured out that He was teaching me through things i didn't know he was teaching me though... or through things i didn't think i could learn from..
He really does use all things for my good? even things that seem insignificant...

That i have the best of friends at home..i already knew thins but being away from them always highlights it even more.

That i have sooo much to learn.

That i need God to do anything and am powerless without him.

That i still have issues. (nothing new)

That running on the beach isn't as glamours as it looks.. after ten min. of running the beach turns into a desert.

That I'm growing up faster than i realized and the feeling of missing out on part of my families life/ sisters life breaks my heart way more than i thought it ever would ( i had to miss her graduation and senior recital)

That California shouldn't be called the sunshine state because its been cloudy the past 2 weeks almost everyday.